Friday, October 01, 2004

It slices, it dices

For some time now I've been wanting a compact, simple, well-made vegetable slicer-dicer. I like to cut up an onion and sautee it with some mushrooms for a side dish on my Atkins diet.
The other night--wee hours of the morning to be precise--an infomercial came on for just such a product. Mind you, I rarely watch these things, but the female sidekick on this one was so ugly I was mesmerized. I think she was the last dumb blonde character on Three's Company.
Anyway, this handy dandy machine seemed to be the answer to my animal sacrifices, er, I mean prayers. It did everything from make peanut butter to salsa to chopped liver. It takes up very little counter space, which is important in our crowded kitchen, and it was only $40. But wait! It also came with an eternally sharp, ergonomically designed slicing knife, four steak knives, and one other thing I can't recall. Free shipping, too.
But I didn't make the call. I just can't believe that anything one buys from an infomercial is worth a wad of spit. Cheap plastic, poorly tempered blades that actually do go dull the first time they meet a peanut, dangerous wiring, and a motor that burns out as soon as the last unit is sold. That's what I assume they're hawking.
I also have this theory that the people who sit in for the taping of those commericals are the ones who have invested in the product or work in the factory that makes it, although the lack of Indonesians in the room may put the lie to that last idea.
So I could go to the store and see if I can find a different slicer-dicer or I could continue to use a knife. Or I could channel surf again this morning and see if the same deal is being offered.
Stay tuned.


Bill said...

My niece and her husband were once in the audience for an infomercial. I don't know how the contact was made, but they were paid for their time.

Dave Lewis said...

Shameful as it is to admit, I once bought something from an infomercial - and liked it. And after two years of almost daily use, it's still working. It's the Amazing Flavor-Wave Oven, able to nuke a frozen steak, pork chop or chicken breast to perfection in about eight minutes. In fact, it's the same gizmo that cooked your steak last time you were here.